No, all our boys and men don’t talk like this.
But, when anyone thinks that the justification for offensive remarks about women that amount to sexual harassment and uttered by a presidential candidate is that they’re merely the “locker room” banter boys indulge in regularly, it’s clear that they believe that it’s an effective excuse expressing their view of American culture. Even Pat Robertson who claims to represent Christianity dismissed the words as “macho” talk.
If this justification is even used for lesser banter, it abandons our boys to the untruth that this is just how they are – “boys will be boys.” It surrenders our girls to having to cope with a macho gender role that treats them as less than human.
If this were how things just are or must be, it would mean giving in to the meme that to get their man, women will have to live down to such objectifying expectations. It would mean that our boys must forgo their humanity to get in line with treating women this way or be ridiculed by other boys as “wimps” and “queer.”
We want to say that none of this really goes on in men-only spaces. Many of us have tried to create places and communities where talk and actions that sound like sexual assault of others aren’t acceptable.
But men especially must not dismiss this too quickly....
more of this latest column and others.
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including his, in this issue, saying that we must go beyond just calling bigots hypocrites - the religion itself has to be held accountable. He names names and is right: 'What we’re seeing is the heart of what right-wing religion itself really is, not merely hypocrisy.'"
-- Letter to the Editor in the Liberty Press where "Minor Details" has appeared monthly for 18 years, written by veteran LGBT activist (since 1959) and a founder of LA's Homosexual Information Center in 1968, Billy Glover
I Had Time to Read Only One Other Article This Week,
Most Helpful One for My Work Would Be —
Desmond M. Clarke: "Religious Belief, Fundamentalism, and Intolerance" (January 16, 2016)
"In many western democracies today, the defensive strategies of churches—to protect their members from ‘contamination’ by non-members—are limited to demands for separate schools, in which they can indoctrinate those who had been made members involuntarily soon after their birth. Peaceful non-engagement with other citizens has replaced civil war. Those who still endorse the logic of Aquinas and Calvin, however, are not restrained by the uncertainty of their convictions. For them, the Kalashnikov is the modern equivalent of burning at the stake. Technology changes; poor philosophy survives in the closed minds of religious fundamentalists."
Read Desmond M. Clarke: "Religious Belief, Fundamentalism, and Intolerance."
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Religion Is an Addiction
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Minor Writing on Love, Dating, and Relationships
His Latest Column on 50PlusPrime.com
Is it “bad” to miss someone you love? Are there really any emotions that we feel that we should regret?
Our society certainly trains us to devalue certain feelings, to consider them “bad” in the hope of providing us with stuff that will take them away. It’s a moneymaking approach since the stuff to change feelings is usually sold to us, and often addictive.
Our culture even has defined what feelings we shouldn’t have, or, at least, admit we have....
Emotions in themselves are no more than feelings meant to be felt. We can choose whether to act, base our thinking on, or make decisions on the basis of those feelings.
Those emotions society tells us are “bad” and we shouldn’t have, are important....
more in Dr. Minor's latest column: "Let's No Longer Feel Bad About How We Feel"
Fairness Project On-Line Activist Tool Kit
The Fairness Project is in the process
of making available the handout materials from
Dr. Minor's popular workshop: "Being an Activist
Without Being a Victim." These materials are chosen
because they encourage activist leadership to proceed
from a progressive, healing model which contradicts
the models of leadership found in most popular
forms, models that are meant to keep the system
in place rather than to make changes that support
humanity, and result in burnout among leaders.
To access the current materials in The Fairness Project Tool
Kit for activist leaders, click